I have to confess something. Whenever I see a trending topic of some obscure washed up celebrity, I must click through to find out why they're trending.
The following stories annoy me:
- Having a baby.
- Engaged/getting married.
- Plastic surgery.*
- New reality show.
- Whining about something (celebrity problem or normal person problem).
- Or trying to get attention for a cause.
Things that do not annoy me:
- Dead. Not that I'm hoping that they're dead, but I am convinced that the only reason anyone clicks through at all is the possibility that they're dead.
- Checking into rehab. I know a lot of people would probably put this on the above list, but I see that and I'm like, "Quick, someone get Dr Drew on the horn. Potential new cast member for Celebrity Rehab!"
- Arrested. The severity of the charge is irrelevant. Jaywalking? Drunk driving? Mass murder? It's all good but of course bonus points for bizarreness (Randy Quaid and wife, I am looking in your direction).
- Dramatic change in weight. Again, I don't want to give the impression that this is all about schadenfreude--most of us just add former classmates on facebook to satisfy that emotional need, anyway--but it's very interesting to see how weirdly their familiar celebrity heads and faces change after losing some weight. More interesting than finding out some has-been started packing on the pounds.
*Kenny Rogers excepted.
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